homeschooling doesn't need to mean school at home

This one has been a very inspired blog to write. This subject, "school at home" has been popping up everywhere and I going to share my thoughts on it. Feel free to comment or discuss...
When I first began homeschooling I went with what I knew. Chris and I ordered the best workbooks and textbooks from a top christian academy. I set my front room up to look like a kindergarten classroom. I implemented everything that I could remember happening in school. I liken it to when I stepped out of the institutional church. I tried to stick to my bible reading, praise and worship, and listening to sermons online on Sunday mornings.
I knew that the institution (both school and church) were not for my family, but I didn't know what was. So I did what I knew, at home.
The familiar model makes us feel more comfortable, secure in our decision, and perhaps a little more legitimate.
For some families this style works marvelously. Kids and parents thrive and home education is just what it's supposed to be - a nurturing, relevant, and creative education. For most, school at home is only a launching point, a place to start down a familiar road. Not many families I have met in the last 3 years do it this way. They move on to other styles that fit them better.
Since school at home imitates the public school system, it still carries the same issues and downsides that regular school does.
It all changed for me when I noticed Ben's joy for learning was withering away. He went from loving to do his workbooks and playing school, to seeing them as boring. He had just turned 5 and was beginning to see school as something to "get through" so he could get to the fun stuff in life. I began to ask myself some serious questions: Is he looking forward to what we do? Does he approach his work with reluctance or enthusiasm? Is learning exciting and natural or is it becoming a chore?
We were unhappy. All my dreams of having a nice little classroom at home were fading. In it's place my child was finding learning boring and that was simply not acceptable to me. What's the use of teaching my kids how to find and explore valuable information if they find it too boring to ever use it? I wanted them to not only be prepared for Harvard, Yale, or Brown. More importantly, I wanted them to be excited about the world that we live in. I wanted them to think for themselves AND to appreciate the classics... great books of the past, beautiful works of the symphony, a real understanding of the human race, where we come from, what makes the tree frog so colorful. I wanted to have my 6 year old search so in depth about a topic that at the library he goes right for the adult shelves(instead of the children's) because they have the "real" information in them. I didn't want him learning from dumbed down twaddle that this pricey, top notch curriculum was feeding him.
I was bored so I knew he had to be.
What this meant was that our family did not thrive under the institutional method. Some families do, but not very many. I realized that if my kids were in school they may be diagnosed with a host of learning disabilities to disguise the fact that they don't learn well in the institution of school. At home we can see that they just learn better using different models.
My boys are very hands on. They like to take one topic and bleed it dry. They don't like to do the typical "school" spiral method of learning a little more each year. They want to take a subject they like and sink deep into it. And they have the freedom to do so at home.
When we first began doing this I worried that they may not be up to par with what the kids are learning at school, but they are. They pass tests with flying colors. I don't need to give them tests because when I have conversations with them I know what they learned and what they didn't. But we do the monkey dance for the state at the end of the year and guess what, they do great!
The beginning of homeschooling is trial and error. Try a book, a curriculum, a field trip, a game and it works; the next one doesn't. That is normal and part of the learning process. School at home was our first step. I am now not so surprised that it was far from our last step. Just like when I cook an exciting new meal, take a vacation in a beautiful new place, or move to another city for a church that blows my mind, I have also realized that there are more fascinating and appropriate ways to homeschool than just bringing school home!
Thanks for reading!
Love,
Jackie

hope for autism

"All illnesses have some hereditary contribution. Genetics loads the gun and enviroment pulls the trigger." -Dr. Frances S. Collins(important suit in the medical community)
My son has something wrong with him. He is 5 years old, has very special needs, and is somewhere on the autism spectrum. So far it has been a very long road of finding out what was wrong and discovering ways to parent him. In the last couple of months he has gotten worse. He has meltdown after meltdown, his brothers don't want to be near him, and I often find myself confining him to his bedroom so I can do things like cook dinner. Something has got to give. I can't do this anymore. We are all trapped inside this label called autism and I am going to get my son out.
First, I would like to mention that I am fully aware of all the medical research out there. Probably more than most people. I spent months on bedrest with my last pregnancy and do you know what I did? I researched vaccines. Everyday. That having been said, I know my son was not born this way. I know when he changed. He changed after a vaccine, two of them actually. I believe the first allergic reaction was the one that did him in. The one just cemented his place on the spectrum. Like I wrote at the top of this page, I believe my son had a pre-exsisting sensitivity to the aluminum and formaldehide and the vaccines just set it off. After receiving the vax (both times) he stopped pooping for a week. A breastfed baby that doesn't poop for a week can get very, very ill. The toxins that build up in his colon poisoned his fragile body. My son is just one out of every 50 children that have a bad reaction to these vaccines.
All of the reports that claim vaccines are 100% safe and do not cause toxic allergic reactions, are backed up by companies that would lose a lot of money if we didn't give our kids their vaccines. There are doctors however, that will speak truthfully about the dangers of these poisons despite the risk of losing money and credibitlity. Most notably Jay N. Gordon, MD, FAAP, IBCLC, FABM who is Assistant Clinical Professor of pediatrics at UCLA Medical Center and Former Senior Fellow in Pediatric Nutrition at Memorial Sloan-Kettering Institute who said this: "Vaccines can cause autism". There are studies that say vaccines do not cause autism. They may be right. But, the vaccines did cause my son to get sick and not poop, releasing heavy amounts of toxins into his body over a period of a week. That caused his autism. Are we truly shocked that mercury, aluminum, and formaldehyde are making babies sick?
Off my soap box. I am writing today after a hopeful light-at-the-end-of-the-tunnel decision we made. While at the end of my rope I was beginning to think about sending my son away to live with someone else. Can I tell you that I was truly defeated in this struggle? I prayed a very desperate prayer and waited on direction from God.
A response was plopped into my lap in the form of a book written by Jenny McCarthy. I knew that her son was on the spectrum and that she healed him somehow. What worked for her son may not work for mine, but I am going to try it. I have hope. It has been hard reading this book because I sob and sob. She knows exactly what I am going through. I only wish I would have read this sooner. It is so encouraging and supportive to me to know that she's gone through this too. If I ever get to meet her I will hug her and tell her how much sharing her heart means to me. I am NOT alone!
I need to go now, but I just wanted to share this ray of hope. I will most likely keep updating this blogs on the progress of our plan (we are going to detox him and change his diet).
Thanks for reading!
Love,
Jackie

We began our official "school" year about a month ago. Thing one(yes, I am calling my child thing one) is in 2nd with some subjects, and 3rd grade in others. Thing two is on the autism spectrum and so he is soaring in math, but slower in reading. I consider him in the very beginning of kindergarten. I began homeschooling him on his 4th b-day and he is five and a half now. And the littlest thing, thing 3, is doing preschool workbooks and crafts.


This year our focus will be attentiveness and obedience. Because I have boys, I have a long-standing struggle with these character traits. I have noticed that other families with boys struggle with the same issues. I have been observing all the different parenting styles and reading lots and lots of parenting articles in my home school magazines trying to come up with a parenting style that's best for us.


The hubby and myself are both super-strict at home. We have family "guidelines" printed out and put around the home that we re-read a few times a year. On it are statements like ~ never raise a hand to hit or a voice to yell, respect others above yourself, show forgiveness before it's even asked for, etc. Our boys are great, but we are not so blind(anymore) to think that they may act differently around others than they do with me and Chris. Every kid does. It's like when we were in school and a substitute teacher would come. We new we could get away with murder!They are still children and we are only beginning to get into real issues raising them.


In my reading I have identified that there are two main qualities I want instilled in my children, 1) I want them to listen to mom and dad as well as all authority and 2) I want them to love each other and others. Both are equally important. We are given 18 years to do so. We are doing alright. Our kids are nowhere near raised and are not perfectly well behaved little boys, but no little boy is.


So, in our homeschooling we do our lessons based around the Lord and character traits. We are very eclectic, but our main style is unit study with an emphasis on fine literature. I am a big, big fan of Sonlight and Heart of Dakota curriculum, which both emphasize kindness and forgiveness. In two years we are going to switch to My Father's World so I can teach the kids from one teacher's manual. I got the curriculum earlier this year and have looked through it. It seems right in line with what Chris and I are trying to teach in addition to having a real focus on the needs of people around the world. The family that wrote it is a missionary family and they have a heart for bringing Christ to every nation. Man, I can't wait to get to that!


I love my boys. I have sacrificed everything for them. I am not really a "mom" type person, but with my kids I find it easy to be one. I hate that I finished two years of vocational school only to never get certified or work as a pharm tech, but in homeschooling I have found a new passion(which is homeschooling). In having community life with the church we moved to Gainesville for, I have been able to relax a little and see that it's normal for my boys to not be perfect. I find comfort and strength from other moms of boys. Sometimes Thing 2(on the spectrum, remember) has me so frustrated that I lock myself in a closet and just cry, but the Lord gave him to me for a reason. I trust that God won't leave me hanging or give me more than I can bare. I pray for another mom with a child on the spectrum to move here all the time, but even if that never happens I will be okay. I may be alone in that particular struggle, but I am not alone in parenting.


I hope you all enjoyed reading. It's been a while since I've blogged because I've been working on a project at night, but I felt the itch this morning. Off to teach my boys with a heart of gratitude and love.

Blessings,
Jackie