We began our official "school" year about a month ago. Thing one(yes, I am calling my child thing one) is in 2nd with some subjects, and 3rd grade in others. Thing two is on the autism spectrum and so he is soaring in math, but slower in reading. I consider him in the very beginning of kindergarten. I began homeschooling him on his 4th b-day and he is five and a half now. And the littlest thing, thing 3, is doing preschool workbooks and crafts.
This year our focus will be attentiveness and obedience. Because I have boys, I have a long-standing struggle with these character traits. I have noticed that other families with boys struggle with the same issues. I have been observing all the different parenting styles and reading lots and lots of parenting articles in my home school magazines trying to come up with a parenting style that's best for us.
The hubby and myself are both super-strict at home. We have family "guidelines" printed out and put around the home that we re-read a few times a year. On it are statements like ~ never raise a hand to hit or a voice to yell, respect others above yourself, show forgiveness before it's even asked for, etc. Our boys are great, but we are not so blind(anymore) to think that they may act differently around others than they do with me and Chris. Every kid does. It's like when we were in school and a substitute teacher would come. We new we could get away with murder!They are still children and we are only beginning to get into real issues raising them.
In my reading I have identified that there are two main qualities I want instilled in my children, 1) I want them to listen to mom and dad as well as all authority and 2) I want them to love each other and others. Both are equally important. We are given 18 years to do so. We are doing alright. Our kids are nowhere near raised and are not perfectly well behaved little boys, but no little boy is.
So, in our homeschooling we do our lessons based around the Lord and character traits. We are very eclectic, but our main style is unit study with an emphasis on fine literature. I am a big, big fan of Sonlight and Heart of Dakota curriculum, which both emphasize kindness and forgiveness. In two years we are going to switch to My Father's World so I can teach the kids from one teacher's manual. I got the curriculum earlier this year and have looked through it. It seems right in line with what Chris and I are trying to teach in addition to having a real focus on the needs of people around the world. The family that wrote it is a missionary family and they have a heart for bringing Christ to every nation. Man, I can't wait to get to that!
I love my boys. I have sacrificed everything for them. I am not really a "mom" type person, but with my kids I find it easy to be one. I hate that I finished two years of vocational school only to never get certified or work as a pharm tech, but in homeschooling I have found a new passion(which is homeschooling). In having community life with the church we moved to Gainesville for, I have been able to relax a little and see that it's normal for my boys to not be perfect. I find comfort and strength from other moms of boys. Sometimes Thing 2(on the spectrum, remember) has me so frustrated that I lock myself in a closet and just cry, but the Lord gave him to me for a reason. I trust that God won't leave me hanging or give me more than I can bare. I pray for another mom with a child on the spectrum to move here all the time, but even if that never happens I will be okay. I may be alone in that particular struggle, but I am not alone in parenting.
I hope you all enjoyed reading. It's been a while since I've blogged because I've been working on a project at night, but I felt the itch this morning. Off to teach my boys with a heart of gratitude and love.
Blessings,
Jackie
Thanks for your article. You definitely are not alone with the raising of boys. We are just starting to get into the homeschooling mindset and your posts are encouraging. I just started reading a book that we have had for a long time and I am sure you are familiar with called "The Strong Willed Child" by Dobson. I am finding it to be exceptionally well written and helpful. Today I gleaned something that helped me get an overall perspective that is more of the journey mindset and realizing even if we are doing everything right we may still have some issues because one their boys and two my oldest especially has a strong will of his own. It seems such a balancing act to teach him obedience without crushing his will. We are learning and am glad we are all in this together.
ReplyDeleteYou hit the nail on the head Seth! I want to teach him obedience without crushing his will or making him think that perfection is required. I have heard of the book, but because it's mainstream I have steered clear. I'll have to check it out again. Sometimes I wonder if others think my children are wild animals because I do give them more freedom to explore(like at a nature park or something), but I am never okay with disrespect or disobedience. And nagging. Nagging is my nemesis!
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