It's been a while since I've written about anything other than homeschooling in this blog. I thought I'd write about the gym today.
My husband got me a gym membership almost 2 months ago. The gym has a great childcare facility and that was the main selling point for us. If we were going to continue living in a town 2 hours away(with traffic at rush hour) from hubby's work, I need some sort of help. But we could not afford a nanny, not even for one day a week. I had also been struggling to lose the weight I gained after my hysterectomy 2 years ago. For months we had talked about getting me a gym membership, but the one closest to us had no childcare. I would never be able to go.
A Saint in our community started working in a gym a while back. My husband went in to do a trial membership and he was sold that this would be a great solution for us. I go almost every day. There have only been 4 or 5 days that I have not gone. The benefits of exercise have been incredible. I had forgotten how good it feels after a strenuous workout. I have a treadmill at home, but it was boring and I had to stop often to punish the kids.
Most days we finish school by 1, we eat lunch and then head to the gym. Some days we go earlier. I value and protect that time. When we first talked about getting this membership I felt guilty. Taking that time and money away from my family had me nervous. I already felt like there weren't enough hours in the day, how was I going to fit in time to workout too? Also, I usually get so disgustingly sweaty, that I need to shower while there too. Where was I going to get all this time? Fortunately, my husband's wisdom far surpassed mine. He saw all the benefits that I couldn't at the time. All I saw was the burden I would be laying on us financially.
For the first time in years I am losing weight and gaining muscle. My husband is complimenting the changes he sees which makes me feel like a teen with a crush.:) I used to drink a venti(that means 20oz, which is a LARGE) Starbucks several times a week. Working out as hard as I do, in addition to knowing the sacrifice Chris made for me to go to the gym, it helped to break my Starbucks addiction. I am more conscious of every calorie and sweet thing that goes in my mouth. The money we have spent on a membership, we have saved by not buying junk.
Probably the greatest benefit is my sanity. I wrote in the beginning that I guard my time at the gym closely. I went from being stressed out all the time to feeling calm and grateful. There have been moments where I have felt anxious, depressed, or been angry at someone and I go to the gym, get that time alone, and can usually sort it out before I leave. There is a mental clarity that happens when my physical self in being worked out. I have sought the Lord in my time alone and have found Him there.
A long time ago I had an eating disorder. It was a serious problem at one point. I have ravaged my body in my addiction to losing weight. It ended when I was forced into a hospital up in NY after my esophagus tore and I was vomiting blood. Since then I have had to be very careful when exercising or fasting. Those things can be hurtful to me if I am doing them in my own strength. When I joined this gym it was very tempting at first to go twice a day(it's open 24 hours)... once during the day with the kids and once at night after they go to bed. It was also tempting to step on the scale(something I really can't do) and begin the obsession. But those things didn't happen. I didn't "try really hard" to make them not happen. I feel like this time and rest is a gift from the Lord. I am lucky to have a family that understands I need a break. I am lucky to have a family that wants me to have a break. I am grateful for this change that has made all the difference. I don't feel like I want to move back to Jax all the time so I can have the rest. Now that I am getting a break I am free to enjoy my time in Gainesville. Christ brought me rest in the form Gainesville Health and Fitness.
There are going to be those who don't understand. I wouldn't have a year and a half ago. I was good at being a mom before. Then we moved and Chris is gone all the time. I have been feeling overworked and lonely. I have doubted Christ or that He was even in me. I can say with all honesty that He has shown Himself to be my rest through my struggles and relief. If you are a mom, and you are having a hard time at the moment... hang tight. Christ will be your life vest too.
Thank you for reading!
Love,
Jackie
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